As far as most of my friends and family are concerned, I am the lone white person in this country of 1.4 billion Chinese people. While it goes without saying that the vast majority of people I encounter on a given day are predominantly Chinese, I see my fair share of White, Black and Hispanic people throughout my travels. SIDE NOTE: Also all sorts of Asian people who aren’t Chinese, but get really offended when I ask. Korean, Malaysian, Japanese, Thai, Vietnamese, Mauritian, and everywhere in between. I’m sorry I can’t tell the difference between you guys, it’s not easy.
Anyway, I attend a school that specializes in teaching wai guo ren (foreigners) Mandarin, and therefore I see westerners all the time while on campus. When I venture deep into the heart of Beijing, however, it is a whole different bowl of mystery meat. This leads me to one of my favorite, yet mostly unspoken practices amongst white people in China. I call it the “White Guy What Up,” and any person who has spent an extended period of time abroad knows exactly what I’m talking about. It’s a widely practice, used with any native English speaker regardless of color, sex or creed- but “White Guy What Up” just flows. The WGWU is a seemingly meaningless glance to the untrained eye, yet when used properly, one can derive unbelievable confidence and reassurance that they’re on the right path.
I’ll set the scene for you: Today I visited a typical 12-story-uber-mega-super-happy-fun-time market looking for a three-ring binder and some other supplies. After searching each row meticulously, I was unsuccessful. Left with no other choice, I was forced to ask a clerk using my nearly non-existent Mandarin, a frequently disappointing endeavor. I was exhausted from the daily toil and becoming increasingly more irritable as the employee tried desperately to guess what item I was looking for through an impromptu game of charades. Just as I was about to lose my shiz and explode, out of the corner of my eye I caught a pretty, white girl in her mid-twenties walking by. I barely got a glimpse of her smirking face, but it was enough. I gave her a chuckle, she gave me a giggle, and soon all my animosity had melted away. I walked away without my binder, but am fairly certain that I was not the first lao wai to lose this battle.
Before rolling back the tape I need to stress how high the frequency of interactions like the one I just described is. It’s a lot, trust me. I am learning Mandarin, but the road is long and lonely. Knowing the word or phrase in Chinese and being able to convey this thought to a native Chinese speaker are entirely different stories. After a while you just want to say “eff it” and give up on whatever you’re doing. If you’re lucky, like I was today, that’s when a WGWU kicks in.
Let’s go back to the story: I was about to have a brain aneurysm and collapse right there in the store. My face was turning red and if I were to pinch the bridge of my nose any harder my schnoz would have materialized into nothingness. At that precise moment, I had a moment with my angel. Did you see what happened there? If you blinked, you missed it. Her meaningful gesture was not a derisive put down, but a vote of confidence. It was as if she pasted a huge “Rosie the Riveter” poster right on top of the clerks face. Her stifled laughter was an acknowledgment of not only the predicament I was in, but also all the BS that we put up with in general. Between the crazy customs/rules in this country and the language barrier (more like language Great Wall), its surprising I get anything done.
Her laughter allowed me to look at myself and think, “What a unique debacle. I guarantee not a single friend in the US went through this today.” Living here has made these daily occurrences quite common. It is easy to take this opportunity for granted, and I often forget how lucky I am to be here. Every day I have these truly remarkable experiences, and if the trade off is some frustration at the check out line, so be it. Millions of people would do anything to be in the situation I’m in and I am in no rush to trade. Plus, if I were at home I would be dealing with even more infuriating people, like the guys who work at Verizon or any bank. And that’s just incompetence.
The true beauty of the WGWU lies in its simplicity. If you think this story has anything to do with the fact that the Heroine was a pretty young woman, you are completely missing the point of the WGWU. It’s basically saying, “Oh what up, I’m a white person in China. You too? Sweet, good luck with your ish.” It was used therapeutically in this instance, but the WGWU is normally a very casual happening. I throw out WGWUs all over the place- while crossing the street, across crowded restaurants, heading to class, etc. All it takes is a head nod and a smile. Its a great unifier amongst those traveling through this strange land. No matter where you came from or where you’re going, two westerners can share the common bond that goes along with being here.
Meeting people here is easier than finding drugs at a Phish concert. All you do is go up to someone and say, “Hey, what brings you to China?” They may be Italian, Spanish, German, etc., it doesn’t matter. We share a deep, intimate connection that is fashioned by the mindset it took to travel completely across the globe for whatever reason. I’ve met some people doing very strange things in China- but despite their quest, the fact that someone else is going through the exact same scenarios that I am on a daily basis is truly comforting.
American Paisa 